Lesson of the Waves

The distance appears calms but all around me is churning. The vast blue ocean rolls towards me. It no longer can withstand the force; it swells mightily. For an instant I can see through the agua, sunlit wave – the awe of it. The dark sand becomes swept up and overtakes the aqua. Just then the water topples over and crashes with a thunderous roar. The surface water displaced and thrust forward by such shear force that it takes out all in its path.

Over and over this happens. Sometimes the waves are so close together that they close in on each other and become even grander. Then the cycle through to a calmer pattern. Each wave has its distinction and can never be duplicated. Each one brings its own force; at times a gentle sweep past my legs while at other times I’m thrown down like a rag doll doing somersaults in the water.

Saturday I stood for a countless minutes in the Pacific Ocean at Jaco watching these waves crash towards me. I was in awe of them. These words and even if I had pictures could not do them justice. As I thought about the waves, God began to teach me. This ocean in my life and at times it’s going to easy and beautiful. Yet a lot of the time I’m going to have waves roaring towards me and there will be nothing I can do about it.

There’s different ways that I can respond to them. I could keep my back to the waves and pay no attention to them. As long as the waves are gentle this isn’t a problem. But it doesn’t take a very big wave to smack you from behind, knock you down and take your breath away. And frankly that hurts! (I had a headache for an entire day from one wave smacking me in the back of my head.)

God showed me that this is me living totally on my own, thinking oh things are good right now I don’t need to spend as much time with God. I’ve got this all on my own. Which I hate to admit, I do more often than I ever want.

If I am watching the waves my second option is to be terrified by them. I can try to prepare myself by digging my feet into the sand, bend my knees, and look away (to keep the salt out of my eyes). This works for the not so hard ones but then again I get thrust forward, pushed further down shore, and on some occasion thrown down. I get cut by the rocks or shells, I end up not where I wanted and at times can be pulled out by the rip tides if I’m in the right place. Even every now and then I try to ride on a wave with my body but 9 out of 10 times it’s unsuccessful and I end up with lungs full of salt water!

God showed me that this is how I am when I am living on my own. I am focused too much on the waves of life and the past. When I get tired and just don’t want to try anymore. This is when I try to do things in my strength and without Him. When I don’t trust Him to provide for me and be my refuge. When I just plainly speaking am being stupid and not doing what I know I need to be doing…trusting MY GOD!

Then the last scenario is that I get on my surfboard (which I have only been on one once with no success) and ride into the waves. Not allowing the waves to take me into shore but swimming into and under the waves to get the best vantage point. To sit patiently on my surfboard and pick just the right wave then ride it in. Now there’s some big challenges with this. First you have to learn how to surf, then learn how to read the waves, then pick the right wave and time, and then actually ride the wave.

I asked God how does this work out to be best for me? He told me that He is the surfboard and the instructor. He is the one who makes me able to ride the wave in. And yes, I will wipe out, I will not be able to catch every wave perfectly, I will get hurt at times. But I can ALWAYS know that He is the One who is getting me through the waves. All I have to do is when I get knocked off get back on the surfboard, swim through the waves, take my seat and watch how He will take me through the waves of life. One at a time. I can’t focus on when the next big one will come for then I will never learn how to live through the little ones.

So His question to me “Are you going to ride the waves or be crushed by them? You get to decide what will happen. I have shown you what your options are and how the will turn out. Now will you choose Me and ride these waves without fear or your selfish ways and be scared of these waves?”

On Sunday morning, the big wave came at me and I heard Him repeat the question He asked me not even 24 hours earlier. I’m choosing to ride the wave as hard as it may be but I want to learn how to ride these waves and not die.

As we were standing at the bus stop to head home God gave me a beautiful rainbow that lasted for awhile. He has been great at giving me rainbows to confirm His love and that He is with me. They always show up when I am struggling with something and He wants to confirm His truth in me. How awesome is He!

Sweet Women

I wanted to share with you some of the beautiful faces that I have fallen in love with. Please pray for these ladies as they need to find their worth and strength in Christ. Please pray for me as I prepare my testimony in spanish to share with the women on 13 November. Thank you.

A Rain Forest Symphony

It was as if I was walking into a dream due to the misty haze the cloud produces. The freshness, the newness, every shade of green that one could make their own full crayon box. It was beautiful. Nature’s symphony played so gently but ever so beautiful.

Last night rain clinks onto each leaf as is travels through the canopy and crescendos at it taps the ground or my face. A bird begins to sing her love song to God with beautiful soprano notes, while another sings tenor. In the distant I hear a squeaky song as if the bird had a sore throat but it wouldn’t stop him from singing his part. A little further into the rain forest I hear an old rickety swing set. This bird was just happy he could sing so he sung his swing tune.

As we walked through the dream world the sun’s rays slowly melted away the cloudy mist. The diamonds of the forest began to sparkle on every leaf, on the moss, and on the spider webs. Hummingbirds raced by me as I could almost feel the wind from the low hum of their wings.

In the distant the soft rushing water could be heard. As I walked further down into the forest it crescendos and the beating of rapids exploded through the softness but decrescendo just as rapidly as it had come. Over and over the stream would make it’s beautiful song known. The shy ribbit of a frog quietly sung for his solo.

The exotic pinks, purples, oranges, yellows, and blues were pleasant surprises awaking my sight. Though they made no sound they produced an awe within me. The clouds gently pushed the sun back and all around became a dream world once again.

Spanish Bloopers

As there is with learning anything new, we all make a few mistakes from time to time. Unfortunately for me that goes the same with learning a new language. Fortunately for you, you can have a good laugh at my expense...since I'm willing to share.

For the first month that I was here I would tell people about my favorite little boy, Noah Gilion, and say "El tiene 16 mesas." I even said "Yo tengo un mesa vivir en Costa Rica." What I meant to day was meses and mes (months, month). So what did I say the first time around (first few 100 times around?) He has 16 tables and I have been living in Costa Rica for one table! One silly letter!

In Monteverde I asked the guy who owned our hostel "Algunos manos en los arbhols?" what I should have said was "monos". I asked him if there were any hands in the trees? Again one letter.

Also while we were there I asked about the big pavajos (birds) but the lady heard me say the word for beards instead. I can't even remember what that word is at the time or even at this time. Though I did learn it at some point in the past 8 weeks.

Coming home from that trip, it was late and I was so tired. I was giving the cab driver directions to my house. My brain could no longer think spanish so I told him, "la proxima semana, a la dereche." I meant to use the word calle, meaning street, instead of semana. so I said at the next week turn right. We all got a laugh from that!

Sadly these are some of the one that I know I have made. I hate to think about all the ones I don't know about!

I´m Falling In Love

¡Sí! You read it correctly I´m falling in love. No I have not found the man of my life (though I am praying that one day I will.) I´m falling in love with the women at the Restoration House.

Today was my fourth time there and I can´t imagine not being around those girls and women. There are several who have stolen my heart. It´s amazing how love has only ONE language and that is love. Though I barely speak their language I am able to communicate by being there, by making a fool of myself to speak to them in their language, by greeting them with the customary kiss and hug, by sharing Christ with them.

These girls and women have such sweet spirits about them and just long to be loved. Even the ones who appear so tough on the outside and resistant to everything have shown a glimpse into their soft spot. I want to love them more!

When I first started attending I thought, "What good am I going to be when I can´t speak their language? I´m just going to be in the way and a bump on a log. I won´t have anything to add to this group." Thank God that He is able to do so much with a willing heart!

1 John 3:18 says "Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth." Do not love with just mere words or tounge. God gives me "Get Out of Spanish Free" card right here! (Yes, I know it´s not a pernament one but it´s a for now one!) I can love and am loving these girls and women through my actions and how they line up to the Truth of the Bible! Oh that Christ´s love with overflow out of me and onto these precious spirits!

I have several prayer requests for you to be taking to the Throne of God.

• On 13 November I will be giving my testimony with special emphasis on what is pertaining to our lesson for that week. I will be speaking this in Spanish. Please pray that the Lord will help me in preparation, the translating, and that when I talk it won´t be just me reading it but that the Spirit will provide the words for me.

• Today, several of the girls were talking about wanting to learn English. Some already have a good base knowledge of the language. There are English as a second language programs here but the women can´t attend them. My school partners with this program. Please pray for wisdom. I would love to be able to go some other time in the week and teach some of them this but I don´t know if I have the time or need to be adding something else to my plate. Pray for guidance and that I will faithfully seek God´s will for this.

Getting There IS Half the Fun!

11-12 of October, I had the wonderful privilege to visit Monteverede, north of San Jose. The adventure started Friday afternoon as four of us began a scavenger hunt for the bus station to buy our tickets for 6:30am on Saturday. The bus stations are spread out around town with no signs to aide us.

We visited one bus station and through extensive communication issues we finally learned that this was not the correct station and were give new directions of “100 meters turn left, 200 meters turn right, and then some other meters turn left.” Once again all in Spanish. “100 meters” distance changes with whom you talk to.

We were lost and in a bad part of town. As we were standing at an unusual intersection I commented, “We don’t want to look lost.” At that moment, a guy in his 20’s came up to us and asked where we needed to go. So much for not looking lost.The guy took us to the bus stop which was fairly close, but of course for a “tip”. On our way back we realized just how far out of the way we went to get to the bus station. At least it was a refreshing walk!

Saturday morning began at 4:30! We were able to catch two taxis and off, the five of us went. The bus ride was going pretty well. As we began to climb in elevation the roads began to get a little more “daring” and I found myself praying on several occasions. I’m still unsure how we made some of those turns and curves!

We finally arrived to where the payment ended and the gravel, rocky, potholed, uneven, curvy mountain road began. This is where the real fun began! There was a long line of cars stopped going up the mountain and the bus driver told us in Spanish something to the extent of “Everyone off. We are changing buses.” We all piled off and began walking up the mountain with all our stuff.

As we walked past half a mile of parked cars or so; I noticed everyone was smiling, sitting on the ground out of their cars just chatting away. Only in Costa Rica! As we walked around the curve we finally saw the problem; a recent landslide was being cleaned up. The road was a mud pit for at least 100 yards. We had no clue what was going on.

We stood there with the rest of our fellow journeymen, wondering “have we been hi-jacked and not told about it” as my friend Amanda perfectly said assessing the situation. Just then cars began coming down the mountain. Now remember we are standing on the side of a mountain road, just behind us a few feet begins a drop. This means only one thing, splashing mud! Thankful we didn’t get splashed too bad.

We saw no bus in sight. One of the road workers yelled down to us that our bus was up the hill. WHAT! We have to walk through this mud? Yes! That we did. Once again my Old Navy flip-flops get to be in a blog because I was wearing them. I tried to see what path would be best to take but I couldn’t find one so I stepped out and the mud rushed over my foot like water – for 100 yards!!

Now I have to get back on the bus and nothing to wipe my feet off. We found a little trickle of water running down the side of the road and tried my best to get some of it off. Who knew that a few foot mud mask was included with the bus ticket!

We finally arrived to Monteverde and found our fantastic hostel. It began raining as soon as we got there so our plans were changed and we headed out to lunch, the cheese factory, and then walked through some streets in the middle of the country.

We got up early once again on Sunday and went to the Santa Elena Cloud Forest. What beauty awaited! It was like walking into a dream due to the misty haze of the cloud. The freshness, the newness, every shade of green that one could make their own full crayon box. It was beautiful.

The way back was uneventful, however scary on the type of roads we were traveling on. I said a lot of prayers down that mountain. It was such a great weekend away for rest and it was awesome to be cold again. All I had to do was close my eyes and it felt like fall!

Sunset along the street Sunrise from our hostel. Further out in the distance is the Pacific coast which is quite some miles away! These boots were made for walking...walking all in the mud! The rain forest never quit suprising me with all the variety of life within it! The trees were giants and I felt like an ant.

The Women´s Restoration House

For the last two weeks, on Thursdays, I have been visiting a women’s Restoration House. This is a safe, Christian place for teenage girls and women of all ages to come to get off of drugs and alcohol. There are about 10-15 women there who get three chances and are able to stay for 6 months. The home is ran by several women who were once in the exact shoes that these women currently are in.

The stories of the women at the home are ones of loss, abuse, aching, longing, and hurt. Young girls who only wanted to be love. Women who grew up knowing nothing better. Young girls and women who are hiding in such grief.

One beautiful young women lost a parent at a very young age and a family member began sexually abusing her. She left for the streets where she became involved with drugs. She has been shot and stabbed several times and she is only 19.

Another woman is on her third stay at the Restoration House and has been there for three months. She is probably in her late 30’s. She has such a sweet spirit and loves Jesus. She lost her mother when she was 12 and her father sexually abused her. She too ended out on the streets and began to hide in the drugs.

Another young girl got involved with drugs because she was hanging out with the wrong crowd.

These are just a few stories of the women who are in this home trying to get clean. They have been abused, experienced loss, made poor decisions, were homeless, got involved with prostitution, became addicted to drugs and alcohol.

I visit here with several other women from school to facilitate a 12 step Bible study to sobriety through Christ. I am unable to speak much and understand a lot of what is said but I love being there to love on these women. It’s at these times that I see my inability to speak Spanish as a gift to be able to have one of the girls teach me Spanish and build a relationship with her through that. However, it’s also at these times that I get so frustrated because I can’t communicate and it kills me to not be able to help these girls verbally.

Just as I write this post, God is showing me how my inability to speak the language takes my mouth out of it and showing Christ’s love through other my actions. (I need to go journal about this.) I am excited about the possibilities of this ministry.

Please pray for:

• The women to find Christ and that He is their strength to sobriety and healing of ALL past wounds.
• That the women will become very active in the Bible study and the work during the week.
• Thursdays, 2-5pm (Mountain time) as we spend time with the ladies and facilitate discussion.
• How the Bible study time is to look like – what works best; what’s most effective, etc.
• Ultimately that each of these women will come to know and have a life-changing relationship with the Sovereign Jesus Christ.
• Relationships with the women to be formed.